The Battle over the Norwegian
by gomenasai-for-everything
Summary: This is the sequel to The Jealousy of a Swede, and involves a full-on battle royale between Skwisgaar and Nathan! The whole Haus gets divided, with Skwisgaar and Pickles on one side, Nathan and Murderface on the other, and Toki in the middle! We'll finally see who really gets the adorable little Norwegian!
1. Chapter 1

A/N Well, by popular demand and in order to avoid a possible lynching, I have somehow forcibly lifted my lazy ass and started on this sequel. I hope you guys like it!

Disclaimer: I don't own Metalocalypse.

* * *

Charles' POV

It was ah, rather early when one of my most ah, trusted men entered my office with a low bow.

"Master Ofdensen, we have received word of some… tension, I suppose I should say, in the band." His words sent ah, a chill down my spine.

"And ah, what would that be?"

"It seems that Master Skwigelf and Master Wartooth have formed a relationship, and Master Explosion is… displeased, to say the least. In the past week alone they've fought over ten times, often resulting in rather serious injuries. Would you like to attempt to resolve the situation?" I could ah, feel my hand drift to the bridge of my ah, nose without any consent from my mind. I should've expected this. I really, really, really should've expected this. I should've had a plan in place for such a ah, situation as soon as Skwisgaar confronted me. I really, really should've. In ah, cruder terms, I seriously fucked this shit up. Damn.

"No. Just ah, no. I'm not involving myself in this. No. Not at ah, not at all. Stay out of it unless they appear to be ah, killing each other. As long as no bones are broken it's not my problem anymore. I've ah, I've tried. A lot. But no. I give up." I never ah, thought I'd have to say something like that about Dethklok. But I wouldn't take that back. I wasn't touching this situation with a ah, ten foot pole. Someone else could deal with this. Maybe William. This situation would probably piss him off enough to ah, to act. Yes William could handle this one. Anyone could, really. Just ah, just not me.

* * *

Murderface's POV

Sho, fucking Skwishgaar finally did it. He finally ashked Toki out. Of fucking courshe he did. Shtupid dildo. Well, no way in hell I'm going to shide with him! If I can't have Toki, then he should go to Nathan! Not that I wanted him or anything. I jusht think he should be with shomeone that can make him happy, inshtead of an asshole like Skwishgaar. Yeah, that'sh all it is. Fuck, I need to talk to Nathan. Hopefully he ishn't beating the shit out of Skwishgaar right now.

* * *

I had to walk all over the goddamn Haush before I finally found him walking around in one of the hallsh.

"Nathan, I heard about what'sh going on. I jusht wanted to tell you I'm on your shide, I don't think Skwishgaar should go out with Toki either."

"You uh, you serious? Because if you're fucking with me I'll beat the hell out of you too." Shit, Nathan has been angrier than ushual lately! He'sh been shtomping around all over the placshe, he shkipsh mealsh, he'sh even been fucking exercishing again!

"I'm being totally sherioush! Skwishgaar'sh an assh!"

"Okay. That's… good. Hey, go get Pickles. I wanna see if he'll help me out to. I've got a fucking plan." It wash weird to shee Nathan sho fucking thoughtful and shit, but I shtill didn't want to pissh him off, sho I went around looking for Picklesh and finally found him on one of the balconiesh teashing the yard wolvesh. Of courshe I had to find him drunk.

"Picklesh! Nathan wantsh you, you shtupid dildo!"

"What's dat douchebag want? He oughta know I ain't ganna help him fuck with Skwisgaar an' Toki." Maybe not ash drunk ash I thought.

"Why not? Skwishgaar ish alwaysh a huge dick to Toki! He shouldn't have to put up with that!"

"You an' Nat'an can be really fuckin stupid, ya know that? Skwisgaar's like a grade school kid, ya know? He teases tha one he likes. Toki does tha same damn thing. It's kinda cute, now that Skwisgaar don't think I wanna fuck Toki and he ain't tryin ta beat tha holy livin shit outta me. Besides, least now they won't be fightin in tha middle of practice." Who the hell ish Picklesh calling shtupid! That'sh not a good fucking relationship!

"Yeah, they'll jusht be making out and shit! Jeshush Picklesh, that'sh not how people who love each other are shupposhed to act!" Picklesh laughed.

"How tha hell would you know? We're a fuckin death metal band, we ain't gonna have some pussy ass version of love, we gatta be brutal even when it comes ta dat. Anyway, I'd rather look at them makin out than see Toki in a collar on Nat'an's lap while Skwisgaar sat in tha corner pullin his hair out, cause you damn well know dat's what would happen if Toki an' Nat'an gat tagether." I jusht glared at him and shtomped back to Nathan, but I ran back to my room a few minutesh after that. Nathan looked like he wanted to kill shomething when I told him what Picklesh had shaid.

* * *

Pickles' POV

Damn it, am I still not through with this shit? Nat'an's gatta be plannin somethin. I need ta talk ta fuckin Skwisgaar… he's probably in Toki's room.

I was right, and he let me in tha room like it was his. I had ta admit he was an arrogant little fuck, but I wasn't ganna let him lose Toki just because of dat.

"What ams it? Toki ams in de kitchens rights now, ams dere somethings you need?" Well wasn't he just so fuckin calm! Hadn't Nat'an beat the hell out of him yesterday? Son of a bitch.

"Yeah, I think Nat'an's plannin somethin. He sent Murderface ta try an' get me on his side, an' I figured I should probly tell ya. I don't want ya ta lose Toki because you gat too damn cacky."

"Stupids dildos never gives up, does he? Shits, go try and figures out what he ams wantings to does and helps me stops it. I's ams not goings to lose!" I sighed.

"Yeah yeah. You owe me, ya motherdouchebag."

"Ja, ja, I's get you a fucktons of sluts later, oskay? Ands some booze." Damned asshole. I left tha room and snuck around, tryin ta find Nat'an and see if he'd spill his plan, but I didn't see him nowhere. What tha fuck ever, I'll just trick Murderface inta tellin me tamarrow. I don't feel like dealin with dis shit any more tanight.

* * *

Toki's POV

I's seriously don'ts know what ams going on! Mes and Skwisgaar justs gots together, but I don'ts hardly sees him! He ams always goings off with Nat'ans lately! Ams… ams he already wants to leaves me?

* * *

A/N Okay guys, here it is! First chapter! Sorry it's short, but if you'll remember the last one had a pretty short first chapter too, so just be patient! They'll get longer as this little sequel goes on!


	2. Chapter 2

A/N Okay, so, because I just love you guys so very much, here's the second chapter! Here is where some of the plotting shall be put in place (rather poorly, if I do say so myself).

Disclaimer: I don't own Metalocalypse.

Shout-outs: Well, I've seen a lot of other authors on here doing this, and I figure it might be a more efficient way of letting some reviewers know how much I appreciate them than attempting to reply to them every time they send me a review, since I'm far too lazy to do that. Buuuut, don't expect this to be an every chapter thing, because it's honestly just to thank some of the people who've stuck with my stuff for a while. So, without further ado, here is my attempt to show gratitude! All of you people on this list, thanks a bunch for all the reviews you've sent!

SparklySparkles

jessicajadedixon

Cassidy-Abscission

Arukea

Kagenoyuushi

toki-wartooth

MeltedClay

jude-UK

kitsunepunk400

EvilCannibalPanda-A special thanks to you for somehow sticking with me since my Being Metal oneshot from so very long ago.

Anonymous reviewers:

ChildofAquarius-Thanks a bunch for your interest, I always appreciate long reviews! Also, I apologize for not thanking you personally, but websites and email addresses or anything like them don't come through in reviews. Sorry!

Now I'll actually start the story.

* * *

Nathan's POV

Fuck! Fuck, fuck, fuck! So Pickles isn't going to help me? Some fucking best friend! Shit, I don't care! It doesn't fucking matter! I've got Murderface… shit. I've got Murderface and Skwisgaar has Pickles. Goddamn it. Whatever. Work with what you've got. Where is that piece of shit anyway? He fucking ran off after he told me about Pickles and I damn well need some motherfucking help getting rid of Skwisgaar. …Shit, that dildo is going to make me go to his room isn't he? Where the hell is his room anyway? Damn it, I'm not doing that.

"Someone go get me Murderface!" He arrived ten minutes later with about fifteen Klokateers hanging on him. I smirked.

"Shit! It ishn't my fault Nathan! I didn't tell Picklesh to be a douchebag!"

"I know that, dumbass. I just wanted you to do something for me." He shuddered, and I snickered. Damn, was I really that fucking scary? Brutal shit.

"W-What do you want?" I wanted to laugh. I'd never heard fucking Murderface stutter. Holy fuck I've got to look terrible.

"Go distract Skwisgaar for a while so I can spend a little time with Toki, okay? Just tell him you want to change a part of the album or something, get him to argue with you." Murderface finally stopped looking like he was going to fucking piss himself and grinned.

"Yeah, shit, I can do that. It'sh eashy to pissh that fucker off." I nodded, and the Klokateers let him go. I watched him walk off towards Skwisgaar's room and smiled, finally calming down a little. No way in hell was I going to let him keep Toki!

* * *

Pickles' POV

Skwisgaar's damn lucky I gat hungry and heard dat plannin shit. Fucker's ganna owe me a helluva lat more den a slut er two an' some booze. He's ganna owe me a gaddamn hat tub of booze, an' it's ganna have ta be dat fancy imported shit he gets! He's gatta get me a fuckin semi full of sluts! I ran off ta Toki's room an' opened tha door, surprised dat for tha first time since dey'ed gat tagether Toki was in there by himself.

"Pickle? What ams you needs?" Toki was messin with one of his madel planes, an' he had glue all over his fingers. A lat of tha time I wondered why he didn't just buy himself a real plane instead of fuckin with the fake ones, but hell, Toki was Toki. He didn't have ta make sense.

"I thought we could practice fer a while. You an' Skwisgaar have been so busy lately we haven't been able to fer a while." He smiled.

"Ja, okays! I amnest even knows where Skwisgaar wents, so it shoulds be fine. He ams probablies off hangings out with Nat'an agains…" Gaddamn it Skwisgaar! Already done somethin ta make tha kid misunderstand you! Dumbfuck. Now I gatta deal with dat too. Hat tub full of fancy booze, semi full of sluts, an' a motherfuckin solid gold guitar.

"Don't worry about dat kid. He's gat a lat on his plate lately, ya know? It'll blow over pretty soon." Toki grinned again, but dis time he actually looked happy.

"Oh ja, de albums! I's forgots about dat! Wes got de concerts soon too, don'ts we?"

"Yeah, we do. Dat's why we gatta practice. Get yer guitar an' we'll get started." He only just sat down when Nat'an barged in.

"Toki. We uh… have to practice. Piano."

"Sarry Nat'an, nat right now. He's gatta get some guitar stuff done too, before Skwisgaar gets back."

"He… he ams not withs you?" Toki looked ready to cry, and I rubbed my head. I'm startin ta feel like Charles. Nat'an winced too, and maybe the fucking dumbass was starting to realize that Toki did actually have feelings for Skwisgaar.

"No, I don't know where he is. I haven't seen him all day, but I… heard him in his room earlier. Sounded like he had someone with him, but I figured it was you. So I didn't do anything." Toki dropped his guitar. Dat fuckin asshole! I knew he fuckin liked Toki, but dis shit is just fuckin cruel! Now I know dere ain't no way in hell I'll let Skwisgaar lose him!

"A-Alreadys? For reals?" He almost looked ready to cry, and I glared at Nat'an an ran him out.

"Ya went too far, ya stupid motherdouchebag," I mumbled before I shut tha door, then went back to sit with Toki.

"Toki, Toki, come an! He wasn't talkin about a slut er nothin, he was talkin about me! I been in his room with him most of the day, we were hashin out a few parts in some of tha songs we haven't recorded yet! Dat's how I knew he was busy! He ain't ever ganna cheat on ya Toki, I pramise, an' if he does I'll beat tha hell out of him for ya!" I figured it was okay ta lie a little, since Nat'an had just lied a lat. Fuck, I could tell Skwisgaar what I'd told him when I left, an' den all dis would be fine an' fuckin dandy. Hat tub of fancy booze, semi full of sluts, solid gold guitar, an' he was ganna trade rooms with me.

* * *

Toki's POV

I don'ts know if Pickle ams lying tos me or not, buts he can definitelies make me feels a whole lots better. I's seriously luckies to has de friend like him, whats takes care of me and practices with me. Pickle ams my bests friend fors sure! But… I don't gots no idea what to does about Skwisgaar. If he ams cheatings on me… fucker had betters watch out. But I t'ink I believes Pickle, maybes. I don'ts t'ink Skwisgaar is cheatings on me, buts… what if he ams gets bored? He ams used to fuckings whoevers he wants as much as he wants, sos what if I'ms not enough? I's know he amnest goings to cheats on me, buts what if he leaves me? Stupids lady dildo, makings me worry like dis! I's need tos practice!

"T'anks Pickle. You ams real bigs help. Let's practice, oskay? I wants to goes through de wholes entire album!" He noddeds, and we gots started. Wes wasn't done until pretties late, ands by de ends of it I's was happies again. Pickle yawned.

"Well, see ya later Toki. I gatta get some sleep tanight, ya know? I'll talk to ya tamarrow." I noddeds, and I yawned tos.

"Ja, byes bye Pickle. Sees you later." He noddeds and left, ands I went tos sleep pretties quick.

* * *

Skwisgaar's POV

It was lates, ands I was t'inking of goings to Toki's room, buts dere was a knocks at mine door.

"Skwisgaar! Let me tha' fuck in!" Ah, Pickle. It ams kinds of umspossibles to miss dat voice.

"It ams open, Pickle!" De door flews open, and Pickle stompeds in. Hims face looked justs about as red as hims hair, ands he was obviouslies pretty pissed.

"Motherdouchebag, you weren't fuckin in here with some slut earlier, were you? Because fuckin Nat'an came by and told Toki you were, and you're damn fuckin lucky I heard him an' Murderface talkin and stopped Nat'an from takin Toki off some place. Shit I'm gettin fuckin tired of dis shit!" I's was shocked, tos say de least.

"What in de hells!? Yous know I woulds never does dat! I's love little Toki! Toki ams mine most favoritest persons in dis place! And what de fucks does you mean I's is lucky you's heard Nat'an and Murderface?"

"You'd better fuckin nat have, cause I had to fuckin lie ta Toki an say I was in here with you ta make sure he didn't start fuckin cryin! Anyway, I gat fuckin hungry an' heard Nat'an an' Murderface talkin about Murderface comin in here ta distract you so Nat'an could go get Toki. I went in dere and practiced with him ta keep Nat'an away, but he said he fuckin heard you in here with someone. Ya need ta start spendin more time with him instead of worryin about Nat'an, he's gettin nervous, thinkin ya wanna leave him er some shit! Stap fuckin relyin on me ta do all dis shit for ya! Ya already owe me enough!" I's winced. Mys little Toki was worrieds dat I woulds leave him? Shits, I ams kinds of fuckings dis up. I's need to gets rid of Nat'an once and fors all!

"I's promise, I amnest evers do nothing tos hurt Toki ons purpose. Buts dis ams going tos far. Helps me get rids of Nat'an ands Murderface, Pickle. I's have tos finally ends dis bullshits." Pickle smirked.

"Yeah, alright. So, now you'll owe me a hat tub full of fancy booze, a semi full of sluts, a solid gold guitar, yer room, an' yer car." Its was quiet fors a minute, untils I realized whats he had saids.

"Whats de fucks!?" Pickle laughed and rans off. Piece of shits drummer.

* * *

Pickles' POV

Dumbass guitarist. Whatever, guess I'll have ta hunt down Nat'an again. Maybe I can tell him I decided ta be on his side er somethin, I dunno. Damn asshole better fuckin make use of dis time.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N Hi there folks! It's time for chapter three! Only one chapter is left after this one, and then this series will be over. Also, there's a decent chance I won't have too many more Metalocalypse fics after this, at least not until the new season or movie or whatever comes out.

Disclaimer: I don't own Metalocalypse.

* * *

Pickles' POV

I had ta run all over tha fuckin Haus before I found Nat'an. He was in tha weight room again, probly thinkin of more ways ta beat up Skwisgaar. Dumbass was ganna end up fuckin up Skwisgaar's hands pretty soon, I fuckin know it. Then Charles is ganna get involved, beat tha shit outta all of us, and lock Toki, Skwisgaar, an' Nat'an in tha claset until they work everythin out… why tha hell didn't I get Charles involved?

"Nat'an, I wanna talk to ya fer a minute." He growled, but fuck, I've been around dat asshole fer years, no way in hell can he scare me anymore.

"If this is about what I us, said earlier then fuck off. I'm not going to apologize."

"Nah, it ain't about ya apologizing, but I been thinkin… ya gatta care about him a lat, ta say somethin like dat. I mean, eventually Skwisgaar probly is ganna cheat on him. I think I wanna help ya out." Nat'an sat up an' dropped tha weights he was usin on tha ground.

"Are you being serious or are you fucking with me?"

"Ya know I wouldn't lie about dis." Except when I really fuckin had to ta make sure nothin else gat fucked up.

"Yeah, alright. Good. But uh… don't tell Skwisgaar. You can be like a… double agent or something." I nodded an' grinned. Hook, line, an' sinker.

"Alright. Ya gat anythin ya want me ta do?" He nodded.

"Toki trusts you, right? Try and turn him against Skwisgaar. He'll believe you about it."

"Sounds good, Nat'an. It'll take a while though, okay? Try nat ta come over for a bit, otherwise ya might fuck it up." He nadded, an I left ta head off ta my room. Fuckin Skwisgaar really, really better take advantage of dis, or I'm ganna kill him.

* * *

Murderface's POV

Shit, I can shee why Picklesh would call Nathan shtupid now! How the hell could he fall for that? No way in hell ish Picklesh shuddenly helping him out! He'sh gatta be up to shomething! I ran off after him, and when he went into hish room I shmirked. Lying fucker! I'm definitely gonna shtop thish! I walked towardsh Toki'sh room.

* * *

Skwisgaar's POV

Okays, Pickle shoulds have finished distractings Nat'an by nows. I's can talk tos Toki fors a while, ands I can fixes dis! I's can makes sure Toki knows I's love him! I rans off to hims room and threw opens de door. He lookeds up and smileds at me.

"His Skwisgaar!" I walkeds up and kisseds him.

"Heys Toki." I shuts de door and sats up down on de bed.

"Skwisgaar? Ams you okay? Yous acting sorts of weird."

"Ja, ja, I am. I's just… Pickle tolds me dat I's was fucking things up, withs how I's was handling things… I wants to clears de air betweens us." He lookeds nervous, ands I wondereds why, buts I still puts my arm arounds him. Dat seemed to calms him down a littles. "Toki, I's… I's…" De door slammed opens, ands I jumped. Murderface barged in.

"Toki! Whatever he'sh telling you, don't believe it! I caught him with shome bitch lasht night, they were fucking making out and shit! He'sh even got Picklesh lying for him!"

"W-Whats? Skwisgaar, ams he tellings de truth?"

"Ofs course nots! I woulds never does dat to yous, nots ever!"

"He'sh lying! Nathan told you the other day, he'sh been fucking slutsh even when he wash with you! He doeshn't desherve you!"

"Nos, I loves you, Toki, ands nobodies else! I don'ts need no ones but yous! Crosses mine heart!" Toki pulled away froms me.

"Skwisgaar, I's don't know ifs I can believes you! Murderface ams right, Nat'an tolds me de sames t'ing nots very longs ago… Skwisgaar, I's love you, but ifs you ams going to hurts me… cans both of yous just leaves for a little whiles? Wes got de concerts tomorrow, rights? I needs to practices." I's flinched. Whys was dis happenings? I hadn'ts ever loved nosbody befores, and now everybody was tryings to fucks it up! Damns it! I's needs Toki! I's can't keeps doesing dis, nots when I finallies got hims! Murderfaces smirked ands left, buts I stayed on Toki's bed, starings up at him.

"Skwisgaar?" I's lunged forwards and grabbed hims waist.

"Toki, Toki, pleases! I didn'ts do what deys sayings I did, I's never woulds, not tos you! I knows I don't haves de best reputations, but yous gots to believes me!" He huggeds me back, ands I thoughts for a seconds dis would alls be over.

"I wants to Skwisgaar, I reallies does, buts you needs to gives me justs a little times, okay? Please justs let me bes by myself fors a little bit!" I pulleds my face from hims stomach ands saw two wet spots. Hads I been cryings? Toki touched mine face, ands kisseds me. "Skwisgaar, comes on. You ams not acting likes youself. I really don'ts t'ink you dids dat, buts I justs… I needs to t'ink fors a little bits. Don'ts cry, pleases?" I finally noddeds.

"Ja… alrights. I's leave for a whiles. I loves you, Toki." He smileds.

"I's know, Skwisgaar. Loves you too." I's left, almosts smiling, buts still a littles nervous. Whats if dey had consvinced Toki dat I's would bes unfaithfuls?

* * *

Toki's POV

I's don't know whats to believe anymores! I loves Skwisgaar, I reallies does, but two people ams said he was cheatings on me! I don'ts want to believes dat, I don'ts even knows if I coulds, and Skwisgaar was evens crying, buts what cans I do? I don'ts even knows if I can trusts Pickle anymores! Shits, I don't know whats to be doesing! Why woulds Nat'an and Murderface wants to lie tos me abouts something like dat? Buts den agains, why woulds Skwisgaar bes crying if it was trues? Dis ams too fuckings confusings! Whys can'ts it justs be easy, likes I loves you and den dones? I wants dat, nots dis complicated shits! I's feel like cryings too.

* * *

Murderface's POV

After I left Toki'sh room I went to Nathan'sh, and for oncshe he wash actually in there inshtead of shtomping around shomewhere elshe in the Haush.

"Picklesh wash lying. I shaw him go back to hish room after he left you, and I found Skwishgaar in Toki'sh room." He broke the Sharpie he wash writing with.

"What?"

"You heard me, you assh. Don't worry though, I talked about sheeing Skwishgaar wish shome bitch, and Toki sheemed pretty pisshed, sho maybe he'll break up with him now." Nathan nodded.

"Thanks. Fuck, I gotta get this shit straightened out. I'll do it at the concert tomorrow, I've got to. I don't think this shit can go on for much longer." Nathan wash rubbing hish head, and I've never sheen him sho upshet. I felt short of bad, but it washn't like I could do anything, sho I jusht left.

* * *

Nathan's POV

This is out of hand. Way out of hand. I didn't want to do this this way, I wanted to get Toki fair and square, but I'm so fucking pissed off! I don't want to hurt him, I'm trying to avoid that, but if that's the only way then I'll do it! If I have to hurt him to make him happy in the end I will! I won't let him end up with Skwisgaar, that asshole will fuck him up one day! I'll take care of him, I know I will! I'm the only one who can! No one else but me! I'll look after him and protect him and I won't treat him like shit like Skwisgaar does! Tomorrow at the concert, I'll make him mine!

* * *

Pickles' POV

Why tha hell do I feel like shit just gat a helluva lat worse? Fuckin dumbass Swede probly fucked everything up again, and I'm ganna have ta fix it. I may as well adopt dese fucks, since I'm already their gaddamn mam.

* * *

Charles' POV

The more ah, reports I get from the Klokateers, the more I wish I could have a sane band for just one damn day. I ah, I don't think it's too much to ask to have five guys in a band not want to have sex with one another, is it? I ah, I really don't want to deal with this, but the longer this goes on, the more positive I am that I'll have to step in. I really, really don't ah, want to. At all. I wish William had dealt with this.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N Well, here's the final chapter, the exciting climax of The Battle Over the Norwegian! Hope everyone likes it!

Disclaimer: I don't own Metalocalypse

* * *

Toki's POV

I's hasn't talkeds to Skwisgaar since I askeds him tos leave lasts night, ands I'm kinds of worried abouts how de concert wills go, buts what can I does? I's got to plays no matters what, evens during somethings like dis.

"Hey uh, Toki. I found out what we're doing for that song." I's jumped when I heards Nat'an's voice besides me.

"You dids?"

"Yeah. There's not really any bass stuff in that song, so Murderface is going to play your part and you're going to play piano." I's nodded, ands continued tos look out de window ofs de bus. I's could feel Skwisgaar lookings at me, buts I didn'ts want to talks to him yets. I's really hateds igsnoring him, buts I really don'ts know whats to say. I's can see de concerts hall coming up outsides de window, ands I can't help but feels like somet'ing ams going tos happen tonight. I stoods up as de bus stopped ands walked out before anyone coulds says any'ting. Fors once I was de firsts one in de dressings room, ands I couldn't even bring myself tos talk once de others came insides. Alls I wanteds was tos finish dis show ands go home. I'ds deal with everythings else tomorrows. Charlies came tos gets us justs a littles while afters we finished gettings ready, ands we walked onstage. Wes was so much quieters den we usuallies was, ands I almost couldn'ts believes it. Nots even Murderface hads made a sound! De screams from de fans was almosts welcome, ands for somes reason I wasn't nervous ons stage.

I's played easily through de songses, withouts worrying about messings up, and I figureds de lessons with Pickle was payings off. I'ds have to t'ank him laters, and I smileds. De fans was goings insanes and I could sees blood on de edges of de stage. Dere was somes splattered on Skwisgaar's guitar toos, ands I knew he'd probablies be yellings about it later. I snickereds a little without wantings to, and misseds a note. Stupids Skwisgaar. I couldn'ts even bes upsets with him withouts forgiving him! I playeds a little more angriles, and de fans was a littles more wild. Its was justs like any other concerts we'd ever done, untils dat last songs, de one where Murderface woulds play my part. I's could almost feels de audience gettings ready to attacks when I's handed Murderface mine guitar. Deys probablies thought I was walkings out or somethings, because dey calmed down a littles when a couples of Kloksateers brought de piano on stage ands I sats down. Nat'an smirked down at mes and sats besides me. I kinds of wondereds why, buts fuck, Nat'an was de head of de band, ja? He coulds does whatever de hells he wanted.

Skwisgaar starteds playing, ands I recognized de tune easilies. It hads been my favorites part of de album, whens I'd first heard it. Murderface cames in with mine part ands played a bads note almost rights away. I's flinched, but nobodies seemed tos notice de note, sos I starteds playing de pianos part. I nevers knew why everyone wanteds me to play de damned thing sos much. I coulds hardly stand de sound some days, buts I didn't know whats would happen if I saids I wouldn't plays it. Getting kickeds out of Dethklok was ones of my biggest fears, sos usually I dids whatever everybody else askeds me to. I wondereds if I'd ever justs get tos play guitar with Skwisgaar. Dats was all I's every really wanteds, ever since I's first heards him play. Damns it, I stills love dat asshole, don'ts I? Stupids fuck. Ofs course I does, I don'ts t'ink I's ever stoppeds, evens though I's was sos suspicious. Goddamns it to hells and back, I'lls apologizes after de concerts. I coulds hear de finals refrain of de songs, sos I went to de minors key and traileds off. De audience cheered wildsly, and I coulds see mores blood flying through de air, and dens I felt… lipses? What de fucks! Nat'an… Nat'an was kissings me? I's jerked away, buts everyone had alreadies seen. A bunches of de fans was cheerings, and I jumped up. Nat'an followeds me, buts he went to de microphones. Skwisgaar ands Pickle looked like dey wanteds to kills him.

"So uh… yeah. Me and Toki are together. If any of you don't like it, go fuck yourselves." I's attempteds to yell, buts Skwisgaar beats me tos it.

"No you ams not! Toki ams mine, and we ams goings out!" Nat'an snarleds in response, ands I trieds to talk agains, but dis time Pickle and Murderface gots involved.

"Ya fuckin douchebags! First ya lie to him, now ya come out with dis? Nat'an, you're an ass!" Pickle was veries loud, for hims size.

"Shut the fuck up! You know Skwishgaar really would've cheated on him eventually! You don't know shit Picklesh!" Murdeface was expectedly louds, and I narrowed mine eyes. Really would've cheateds on me, huhs? Those fucks! Skwisgaar smirkeds, like hims was offs de hooks, and Nat'an trieds to punch Murderface. "Fuck, I'm shorry!" By dis time, de fans was gettings involved. Half of dems was yellings Nat'an's name and halfs of dem was yellings Skwisgaar's name, ands honestlies I was gettings pretty feds up. Mine fists clenched, ands by de time everybodies else in de band was ins a fists fight I was mores angry den I'd evers been. I's stomped over to de microphone and yelleds into it.

"Everybody shut de hells up! It ams my fuckings life, I'll decides if I wants tos be with eithers of you, even though after dis shits I shouldn't!" Everysthing quieteds down. "Yous assholes ams been pulling dis shit alls along, likes I will go for whoevers ams de toughest or somes shit! It ams pissings me off! I'm not dat goddamns easy! I will picks who I want baseds on whos I like de best. Hells, de way you two ams been actings, maybe I just pick Pickle, ja?" Skwisgaar glared ats him, and Pickle flinched. Nat'an's fists was clenched. I snickered quietlies. "Nat'an, I amnest even knoweds you likeds me untils now, ands I'm sorries, but you ams just my friends. Skwisgaar, gets yous ass over here." He came over likes de dog, ands I smileds. Its was nice to haves him listens to me every nows and then.

"Ja?" He was toos quiet though. I's kisseds him, ands half de audience cheereds.

"I's love you, you stupids dildo. But you ams such an idiots! Yous didn't trusts me to stays with you insteads of going tos Nat'an, even though I's told you dat I loveds you more den anyones! You mades me worry sos much, fuckings ass!" From de corners of my eye I could sees how pissed Nat'an was.

"Well, you didn'ts trust dat I wasn't cheatings on you!"

"Ands what de hell dids you expect mes to t'ink! Yous was never arounds me, yous was always offs with Nat'an, Nat'an ands Murderface was tellings me you were, yous was actings like you was avoiding me… shits, I'm sorries!" Skwisgaar smileds.

"I ams too, Toki. I shouldn'ts have mades you worry, ands I should've trusted yous too. I loves you, mores den anyone. Yous want to heads back home tos yous room?" I likeds hims smile a hells of a lot more den hims smirk. Fuckers. I coulds play de sames game!

"As ifs! You don't gets no sex fors a month for worryings me! Yous can jack offs like everybodies else fors a while!" His screams echoeds all arounds de stadium, ands I laughed. Damns dildo deserveds it!

* * *

A/N Okay, so maybe not so exciting of a conclusion. But hey, Toki got a little revenge I guess! Anyway, like I said in the previous chapter, this is probably the last Metalocalypse fic I'll do for a while, so sorry to anyone who's disappointed.


End file.
